Things I have learnt whilst being in Isolation:
1) Dad carries his backpack with him where ever he goes, it is usually empty.
2) Mum likes to rearrange the soaps in the house daily. (I mean, what’s better for moving germs around?).
3) Mum and dad think wi-fi, bluetooth, data and data roaming are the same thing.
4) If making soup always add a potato, two cloves of garlic and half your soul.
5) Do not drink and use social media.
6) The bin men will always turn up but your mum will always obsess over where they are.
7) Do not pump up your bike tyres without the supervision of your dad.
8) Mum and dad both have matching iPads although they both only use mum’s (it has scrabble on it).
9) You must have patience with your parents.
10) Mum refuses to waste food. She will instead give it to the dog as ‘tit bits’. I don’t know if I’d class half a chicken, left over veg and a loaf of bread as ‘tit bits’ but the dog is happy.
11) It is ok to be alone and I think I actually prefer it.
12) Cheese makes any meal better.
13) Mum is the Queen disturber of the internet. She continually knocks the modem with the vaccum cleaner then spends the following hour figuring out why it isnt working.
14) Dad believes that he can successfully nurture any plant cutting magically overnight.
15) Your Mum will always ask if you need to the toilet before you leave the house, regardless of your age.
16) Do not alter your bike seat without the supervision of your dad.
17) I definitely prefer to be alone.
18) Dad believes that golf courses should always stay open, even in times of a nationwide pandemic.
19) Mum holds her iPhone with two hands at all times.
20) How to do the cat and the cow pose (yoga). Surprisingly the cow pose doesn’t mean standing in the kitchen eating snacks.
21) When mum questions ‘should I or should I not have a glass of wine?’, she’s about to have a glass of wine.